Bit late on this but I also sponsor Hull’s Third Best Comedian, Mike Cook (@mellamocook ) - here he is wearing the gang colours!
Let’s face it, if you live in or near Hull you are definitely very badly in need of something to cheer you up before you become part of the national crime statistics, so you should make a bit of time and go and watch what has been objectively verified to be not the funniest thing you can pay to see in Hull.
Maybe one day you’ll get to watch the first or second but you probably couldn’t handle that yet living in what I can only imagine looks like a cross between Mad Max and Poundland, so go easy.
Much like the man from the estate that fucks dogs (bear with me here), at some point this guy will *also* be famous so here’s your chance to say “I saw him first” without it relating to someone hanging out the back of a dog. What a beautiful world.
(Also he sets fire to skips I suspect)
The cool trading cards from @ss_trading_cards arrived - if you missed the first post about it, it’s basically a trading card game called Stealthy Spores all about mycology!
Yes that sounds fairly niche but you’re here reading this, aren’t you, so let’s not kid ourselves - it’s *your* niche!
What does my card do? Simple! If you get my card in your hand you automatically win and everyone else has to go and get you a drink of your choice, immediately, and they’re not allowed to moan about it or they have to go and sit in the corner and think about their life choices that led them into the corner.
Its the best card by far, obviously, and because I want to make sure you all get the drinks you so richly deserve I’m going to be adding them to every order of two items or more. It’ll practically pay for itself in short measure (ho ho)!
(Yeah the card *might not* actually do that but just tell whoever you’re playing with that they’re the house rules and if they don’t like it they can go home instead)
Anyway, cheers all, and remember (it’s never been more timely): don’t vote Tory ;) OTC
On my way up to Brum for work, equipped with a lovely book and a bag of the best pasties that Cornwall has to offer (you may have a dissenting opinion on this and all I can say to you is “what’s it like to be so hard-of-thinking”) - can’t go wrong.
If you run (or frequent) a headshop or whatever up in Birmingham and you’d like to have a chat about stocking another awesome product, slide into my DMs 🦧😘
Another month has passed, that tends to happen (if it doesn’t, please attempt to contact your GP as you may be dead and they’ll need to work out if you’re still fit for work or not).
I’m somehow still getting loads of nice new people following every month so for them: every month, a chunk of change gets donated to the local foodbank because, let’s be honest, people and kids are going hungry all the time these days. £240 million gets spent on the idea of plane trips to Rwanda (not a single person actually sent but £240 fucking million spent anyway).
£240 million quid spent on literally nothing of any use when kids are going hungry and cold. I’m no fancy-pants financial chap, but I’ve got a sneaking suspicion that if you put £240 million towards feeding people in this country you could buy upwards of one meal, which would be one more measurable result than the stupid fucking planes idea has delivered. Whoever got that meal would probably have a pretty decent scoff for £240 million, you’d be able to order all the side dishes at the very least.
Anyway, whatever, I’ve wound myself up quite enough for a Wednesday morning now so I’m gonna go and have a stroll or something.
Also! I’m up in Birmingham in the next couple of days to once again go and tout my wares to the local headshops so if you know of any that are cool, let me know! Cheers now, OTC
Up in Manchester for work (as always, if you’ve got a head shop and you want to stock something rad, get in touch), so thought I’d check out Arcade Club in Bury: short version is “it’s the best thing ever”, it’s three floors absolutely packed with every arcade game ever and it’s all set to freeplay! I’d made a mental list of games where if they had *one* of them I’d have been happy, they had *all* of them. Beer’s cheap too. What a fuckin’ place.
Hiya! I’m now featured in a collectible card game called Stealthy Spores (@ss_trading_cards ) - if you’ve got a bit of a nerdy disposition (haven’t we all) you can now get hold of this mycology-based card game and I’m gonna be in it from this summer, alongside people like @mycogeeky , @boomershroomer.v2 and @90secondmycology (who is a bit of a hero of mine).
I’ve bought a shitload of the cards with me on it to give out in packages, so whenever they arrive (being printed as we speak) I’ll be adding them to orders for free because A) they’re cool as fuck and B) you can put my card in your pillow and pretend you’re lying next to me. Wear your best bedtime clothes.
As usual, I haven’t been paid for this, I just thought it was cool, and it’s now even cooler because I’m in it!
Today I will be Tubby Tomsing up some ribs because it’s sunny :)
Bizarrely FarmFoods seem to have some cheap but meaty ribs in so I’m gonna try being a heretic and sous-viding them for a bit because I can’t be arsed firing up the smoker just to see if these ribs suck or not, then it’s off for some Saturday beers :)
This has been your Saturday update, hope you all are doing something you enjoy too :)
BING BONG IT’S BUSINESS TIME
Decent restock of most of the existing bits is now live!
There’s going to be a lot more spore prints listed from tomorrow because I’ve got some pretty cool ones on board, they’re incredible value for money if you fancy “rolling your own”!
Finally: I’ve now changed the postage methods on the site - First Class is no more. It wasn’t properly tracked and with things being what they are these days, it’s been a bit of a headache (and it hasn’t been next-day since the pandemic in most cases). I’ve still got Special Delivery up there if you absolutely need your spores in a hurry, but also you’ve now got the option of either Tracked 24 or Tracked 48.
Please note that “24” and “48” are Royal Mail’s delivery *aim*, so unlike Special Delivery where it’s a “guarantee” it’ll be there the day after posting, this is more of a “pinky promise” from Royal Mail. They’ll do their best, I’m sure, and it’ll be tracked so you’ll know where it is if they are actually late.
Also if anyone out there has more money than sense (or equal amounts) and wants to buy me the Monkey Postman in the picture then I will graciously accept your gift 🦧
Have a rad day! OTC
Another month, another donation to the foodbank! If you are new around here, this happens every month, because somehow even though we’re apparently the sixth richest country in the world we can’t make sure that children aren’t starving. That would simply be too difficult so even trying would be a waste of time.
I was actually chatting to Chris MycoPunks the other day about “stuff” and I mentioned that I couldn’t think of a single thing about this country that had got any better in the past decade or so. Housing? Fucked. Public Services? Fucked. Schools? Fucked. NHS? Fucked. Dentists? Fucked. Roads? Fucked. Councils? Fuuuuuuucked.
You’d think a wealthy country would progress a little in that kind of timeframe, actually make things better, but y’know, why bother?
Also there’s a new blog post up on my website that is *not* fucked, it’s great, give it a whirl.
Oh yeah there’s no post today because it’s a Bank Holiday as I’m sure you’ve noticed on account of not being at work/being massively swamped at work. Back to usual tomorrow :)
Up at Mycopunk’s ridiculously large facility to spread ginger hair everywhere - I managed to get a sneak peek at their official accounts and whoa man they’re getting literally shafted on some of these bills, that’s for sure - not sure how they’re managing to keep their heads above water…
Anyway much love to you all, and I look forward to seeing you at TubbyFest. Tom said if you haven’t got tickets he’s alright with you cutting a hole in the fence, but to make sure you bring your booze if you do so everything stays streamlined.
Yeah boyee I’m up in Bristol for work chats - if *you* run a head shop and wanna stock some cool spores from a funky monkey, drop me an email to danATorangutantradingco.com and we can have a chat about it.
Thankfully the cheeky monkeys back home are on top of everything, same as usual - I’d be lost without them (actually I’d just be stuck back in the office but it’s the same thing).
Also Eatchu in Bristol make some really decent gyozas if you’re in the area, well worth a shot. Cheers now my beauties! OTC
